So I got this John Deere shaped container to store all of Xander’s tractors, things that tractors pull and various John Deere farm implements and started to cram all his toys in it. After about an hour of pushing, pulling, stretching, organizing and re-organizing, I got it all to fit, more or less.I said under my breath, more to myself than anyone: “Man, Grandpa would have loved this.” Xander was quiet for a minute and then said, "I wish I could show my tractors to Grandpa".
I was so very sad for about a second and then I said to him, “you can….all you have to do is look hard at it then close your eyes and think about Grandpa.”I left the room, but, could still sort of see him. Then I hear this kind of whisper, lean over off the table I was working on just enough to see him. What I heard was Xander.
I see him still in his pj’s head arched back, eyes closed, whispering …. having a conversation with his Grandpa about his toy John Deere tractors, things that tractors pull, John Deere farm implements, and how it all fits in his new tractor shaped container.
Today my father, Xander's grandpa (Grandpa chocolate bar), is dead one year.
